Friday, June 18, 2010

Bad, Blogger! No Cookie for you!

So it's official. I am just awful at keeping up with this thing. You'd think that since I set the pace that I'd have no problem, but alas, I do. Much has happened since the last time I wrote. I have some awesome online dating stories to share, but quite honestly I just don't have the energy for that today because aside from the fact that I had a two and a half hour job interview and dinner with my grandmother (who suffers from dementia) I've had a 3 year old crawling around me for a while and I'm completely drained!

So, by way of conciliation, I present you with a head scratcher:
Exhibit A: a precious, angel, tea light holder. This is something we sell at the gift store I work it. They're quite popular around the holidays and Mother's Day.

The company that makes the angel is even nice enough to provide you with the tealight. Comes already in the holder when you open up the box. Isn't that convenient?! Not to mention thoughtful!

Then, one day I found a lonely tea light had been knocked to the floor. I went to go replace it in the angel and I noticed something. I took a picture so I could show you too!

I think it's fairly clear, but in case you can't read it, it says, "For decorative use only. Material may be flammable and is not intended for use of tea light."

If you're anything like me this little warning label took you by surprise. Sure, you see silly warning labels on McDonald's coffee cups warning you that your hot coffee might be hot, irons that tell you not to iron your clothes while you're in them and hairdryers that think you're dumb enough to try drying your hair while still in the shower, but this is different. All of those warning labels just assume that you're an idiot. Yeah, it's insulting, but these United States of ours is crazy over lawsuits and I understand that companies have to protect themselves from these sorts of things.

This warning label smacks of mischief. No, I take that back. Unscrewing the top of the salt shaker is mischievous. This is more...insidious. Sure, the company is warning you from danger. "Don't put this thing to close to flame. It could go up on ya!" while at the same time providing you with something to set on fire. I asked a fellow co-worker for an opinion on this one. I figured that my brain might be too befuddled to make sense of it. She suggested that perhaps this tea light holder, that isn't meant to be put near heat, might be meant for the LED type of tea light. OK, I'd buy that maybe that's what they intend, but then why give you the wrong kind of tea light? Do they feel bad that they're denying you the satisfaction that only a real flame can bring and so they offer you this candle in the hopes that you will use it with some other type of candle holder? Perhaps the type that isn't flammable?

Or, does this company secretly want to see your house, all your worldly possessions and perhaps the family pet, go up in smoke? They wouldn't get blamed for it. After all, they warned you...